you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
