Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
