I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
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i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
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Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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