Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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