I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Blood and glitter go together right?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize