Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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