I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Randomize
