How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
