Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize