he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
did you just send me my own nude
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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