Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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