Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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