hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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