I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
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