it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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