I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
