all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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