drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.