Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
