When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I'm like, not good at living.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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