I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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