I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
