I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
he wants to bone in the snuggie
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
