I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize