Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
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I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
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So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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