you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
