how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize