I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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