Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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