he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
