I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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