Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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