I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
we're making bets on your personal life
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
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