Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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