dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Randomize
