I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
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She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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