I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
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Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
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And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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