I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
