you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
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