just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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