the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
