I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize