woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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