she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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