i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
