Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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