She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Randomize
