I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
