D3 body, D1 cock
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I would ride that face into the sunset
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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