help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
false alarm, still single
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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