I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize