made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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